The phone rings, a quick conversation happens, and suddenly your evening plans have changed. A child or young person is on their way to your home, and you have perhaps an hour to prepare. This is the reality of emergency fostering, a vital role where carers provide immediate safety and warmth when a child needs it most.
While the adrenaline might be pumping, the first day doesn’t have to be chaotic. With a deep breath and a simple plan, you can create a calm harbour in the storm. Here is how to handle those initial, crucial hours with confidence and kindness.
Create a Soft Landing
When the door opens, your primary goal as an emergency foster carer is simply to lower the temperature of the situation. The child arriving on an emergency fostering placement is likely frightened, confused, or exhausted. They don’t need a tour guide or a strict set of house rules immediately; they need to feel safe.
Keep the environment low-key. Lower the lights, turn down the television, and offer a warm smile. Food is often the universal language of comfort. A plate of toast, a biscuit, or a mug of hot chocolate can bridge the gap better than a hundred questions. If they aren’t hungry, just leave a snack accessible so they know it is there if they change their mind.
The Essentials of Comfort
Practicality is your best friend during the first night. You likely won’t know much about the child’s preferences, so aim for neutral comfort. Ensure their room is ready with fresh bedding and a nightlight. If they arrive with nothing, which happens often, having a “welcome box” prepared in advance is a wonderful idea. This could include a new toothbrush, pyjamas in a few sizes, and a soft teddy bear or blanket.
Don’t worry about unpacking or organising their belongings straight away. Let them keep their bag or carrier close to them if they wish; it might contain the only familiar items they have left.
Keep Communication Simple
It is natural to want to chat and make friends, but silence is okay too. Let the child lead the interaction. Introduce yourself simply: “I’m Sandra, and you are safe here.”
Avoid asking deep questions about why they are there or what happened at home. Instead, focus on the “now.” Show them where the bathroom is, show them how to work the bedside lamp, and let them know where you will be sleeping if they need you. Knowing the geography of the house reduces anxiety significantly.
Rest and Routine
Sleep might be elusive for everyone on that first night. If the child is distressed, staying nearby, perhaps reading a book in the hallway until they settle, can provide reassurance.
When morning comes, keep the routine slow. A gentle breakfast and a quiet morning allow everyone to decompress. You have successfully navigated the night, and that is a massive achievement. By offering a safe bed and a kind face, you have already made a world of difference.
